记得同病房住着一个生肺病的少妇，至今我都记得她的名字余小乔。长得温文尔雅，说话慢声细语，她丈夫高大帅气，非常的健谈，这两口子没有孩子就认我做干女儿。我和干妈还去照相馆照了一张相片，还去看过电影。很多生命中的第一次体验都是干妈给的。他们对我特别好，邀请我到家里做客，给我做没吃过的饭菜。走动了很长时间。后来不知道为什么就没了联系。
还有一个同学的妈妈，也做我的干妈。她家有5个孩子，对我特别好，干妈总叫我到她家玩，说不用总守在姑姥姥身边，要我多和孩子们玩。
在陪床的日子里我学会了用开水冲鸡蛋花，用开水焖熟鸡蛋，我在病房里学会了自己学习。
出入医院和医生打交道，遇到各种各样的人。那时候我就有当医生的想法。现在看来一个人无论在什么环境还真得有想法，否则将一事无成。
我的所有，应该都归于姑姥姥的循循善诱和实战操作的培训。挑水做饭，织鱼网赚钱，与人打交道以及改变命运的想法。
姑姥姥是一个很有头脑的女人，她能言善辩，尽管大字不识但见多识广，经历非常丰富。那时候小孩子不能打听大人的事情，但从她的聊天中，也能得到一些她年轻时的生活片段。比如她私奔离家，不知道她嫁过几个人。她有自己的儿子等等，大人都避讳谈到这些。
她经常谈论吃过的美食，纯肉丸的包子是她的最爱。村里邻里之间有做了好吃的都要互相送的风俗，我们两个人的饭量少，哪里够送的，她就把肉包子做成馒头形状，在屋里吃。
她喜欢出门串亲戚，她把我大姨从山东老家接过来，就直接叫她妈妈。在她的操办下很早找婆家嫁到北塘。北塘是个码头，有城镇生活方式。那里有很多村里吃不到的东西。我的记忆里就是塘沽火车站，汉沽火车站的肉包子，馄炖和炸糕。还有北塘的豆浆果子，那种味道至今不能忘怀。我小小年纪，瘦瘦小小，非常能吃，经常招惹的旁人咂舌，能吃一斤肉包子。
她还经常让我去农村的姑姑家拜访。那时候我也就13岁，借自行车自己骑车去，大概要骑上一两个小时。拿上点咸鱼，换回新鲜大米和玉米面。
我妈经常说，姑姥姥很会给人洗脑，她是受害者之一。她被教育的一切服从她的姑姑，每个月把钱，细粮都给我们两个。稍微不主动就会被控诉是个没良心的，要不是她把我妈从山东老家接出来，哪里会有今天的日子。确实，我妈没结婚时，吃住都跟着姑姥姥，配给的粮食不够吃。大家都很难熬！
她也和我诉说她的不易，说小孩子出力长力，不要吝啬自己的体力要多干活帮助别人，求得大家的照顾。她总说，人们敬老人是看在儿子的面子，爱小孩是看爸爸的本事，我们俩一老一少没人待见，就靠自己吧。对这些话我是深信不疑，自己不知被虐过多少回。
生活把我磨练的脸皮超厚，求人不犯怵，尤其是不分昼夜的去请医生。医生们大部分是从城里下来的，臭老九的身份态度极好，大家都喜欢我，教我量血压，有时候他们打牌不想出诊就叫我先去量血压，他们总安慰我，说姑姥姥没什么大病。现在想来有可能是更年期的问题，或者心理问题总要更多的关注。
她一直为我描绘一个前景，在邻村找个人家把我嫁了，离她近互相有个照顾。而且许愿会给我买一辆自行车。
终于我爸爸开始反击了，他要我离开姑姥姥回到父母身边去考大学……
I remember sharing a hospital room with a young woman named Yu Xiaoqiao, who suffered from lung disease. She was gentle and spoke softly, while her handsome and talkative husband took care of her. Since they had no children, they recognized me as their goddaughter. My godmother and I even went to a photography studio and watched movies together. Many of my first life experiences were given by my godmother. They treated me exceptionally well, inviting me to their home as a guest and preparing dishes I had never tried before. We kept in touch for a long time, but eventually lost contact for unknown reasons.
Another classmate’s mother also became my godmother. She had five children and treated me very kindly, She always invited me to her house to play and encouraged me not to stay by my great aunt’s side all the time, but to play with the children more.
During those days of accompanying my great aunt in the hospital, I learned how to use hot water to make egg flower soup and to simmer eggs until cooked. I learned how to study on my own in the hospital room.
Dealing with different people and interacting with doctors during my visits to the hospital gave me the idea of becoming a doctor. Looking back, I realized that a person really needs to have dream no matter what environment they are in, otherwise they will achieve nothing.
All of my skills and knowledge are thanks to my great aunt’s patient guidance and practical training. From fetching water and cooking to weaving fishnets to earn money, dealing with people, and changing my destiny, everything I learned came from her.
Great-aunt is a very intelligent woman. She is articulate and has a broad knowledge of the world, even though she cannot read. She has had a rich and varied life. As children were not allowed to inquire about adult matters, I only heard snippets of her past through her conversations. For example, I knew she had eloped and did not know how many times she had been married. She also had a son of her own, but adults avoided talking about these topics.
She often talked about delicious foods she had eaten, and her favorite was pure meatball buns. It was customary for neighbors in the village to share food with each other. Since we had small portions and could not reciprocate, she would shape the meatball buns like mantou and eat them at home.
She liked to visit relatives and once brought my aunt from Shandong to live with her, calling her “Mom.” She arranged for my aunt to marry into a family in Beitang at an early age. Beitang was a harbor with a urban lifestyle and offered many delicacies that were not available in the village. I remember the meatball buns, wontons, and fried cakes from Tanggu and Hangu railway stations, as well as soybean milk and fritters from Beitang. I was young and thin, but had a huge appetite and could eat a pound of meatball buns.
She also often sent me to visit my aunt in the countryside. At the age of 13, I would ride a bicycle for one or two hours to get there, bringing salted fish and exchanging them for fresh rice and cornmeal.
My mother often said that Great-aunt was very good at brainwashing people, and she was one of her victims. My mom was taught to obey her aunt, who gave us both money and grain every month. If she didn’t take the initiative, she would be accused of being heartless. If it weren’t for her, my mother would not have been able to leave her home in Shandong and have a better life. Indeed, before my mother got married, she lived with Great-aunt and the rationed food was not enough. It was a difficult time for everyone!
Great-aunt also shared her own hardships with me, saying that children should work hard and not be stingy with their energy in order to help others and seek their care. She always said that people respect the elderly because of their sons, and love children because of their fathers’ ability. We, an old woman and a young girl, were not well-liked by anyone and had to rely on ourselves. I firmly believed in these words, and I don’t know how many times I have been mistreated.
Life has toughened me up. I am not afraid to ask for help, especially in seeking medical attention at all hours. Most of the doctors came from the city, and they treated me very well because of Great-aunt’s reputation. They even taught me how to measure blood pressure. Sometimes when they didn’t want to make house calls, they would ask me to measure blood pressure first, but they always reassured me that Great-aunt was not seriously ill. Looking back, her condition may have been related to menopause or psychological issues, and needed more attention.
Great-aunt always envisioned a future for me, finding a family in a nearby village to marry into so that we could take care of each other. She even promised to buy me a bicycle if I made a wish.
Finally, my father began to push back. He wanted me to leave Great-aunt and go back to my parents to prepare for university…
三涵妈妈 
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